This morning I am so thankful for not only surviving the kickoff for the Story Sharing Potlucks last night but also feeling so blessed that it went very well. There were great conversations. Alan Dean as our inaugural speaker did a phenomenal job giving us the basics on storytelling. All the folks who attended said they enjoyed the time and would definitely return again. I am so excited to read through the surveys and start reaching out to those who are willing to come alongside me and make this non-profit a reality.

Below is the synopsis of what I shared with the participants about my vision for story sharing potlucks here in Virginia. I cut out the logistics on how the evening would progress and the introduction to the speaker, but the rest is here to help anyone who wants to understand how I got to this point and what I hope will come next.

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I would like to share with you what Community Plate in Maine has been doing and what my vision is for a similar endeavor here in our state.

I am a non-financial retirement coach who is committed to helping others plan for the emotional, social, and psychological transition into retirement, focusing on lifestyle, purpose, and well-being rather than on money. Currently I coach, develop and deliver workshops on the potential challenges in retirement, and manage a book club. What I have seen in my experience is that our workplace social networks tend to disappear and we often suffer a loss of identity when we leave a full-time career, whether it be in the corporate suite or in the home.

We, as a society, have forgotten how to make human connections, relying either on the structure of our work or our children for social engagement, or looking for superficial bonds through social media. This has led to an epidemic of loneliness. Because my clients are vulnerable, I have sought ways to alleviate or prevent this situation.

I want to share a couple of statistics that emphasis this point. The book titled “The Good Life” shows results from an 84-year multigenerational Harvard Study of Adult Development. A key point repeated throughout the book was that good relationships keep us healthier and happier.

Recently, in May 2023, the US Surgeon General released an advisory on healing effects of social connection and community called “Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation.” It stated that “lacking social connection is as dangerous as smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day.” To summarize, the best thing we can do as we age to prevent decline is to stay socially connected. However, our choices, our lifestyles, and our health often led us to become isolated, which leads to depression, then quick decline.

A friend of mine, Jennifer, happened to come across an NBC news episode on a non-profit organization that hosts these story sharing potluck suppers in Maine. They have been active for three years and are now collaborating with state agencies that focus on aging. Jennifer shared the information with me because she had heard me discuss this topic often and we wondered if Backporch Vineyard would be interested in hosting these kinds of events. Disclaimer here – Jennifer and I have both worked at Backporch and knew Lorrie and Rick personally, so it seemed like a natural fit.

I reached out to the founder and executive director of Community Plate, Karl Schatz, and we had a great discussion about my bringing what they do to our area. There is still a lot to determine, but overall, their group is very happy to help us get started and doesn’t seem to be overly prescriptive in how we do it.

I wanted to experience one of their potlucks in person so I asked Jennifer if she could go with me one weekend. This all worked out well as Jennifer had lived in Bath, Maine for a short time 30 years ago. We looked at the Community Plate schedule, and they had a Pi(e) Potluck and Fundraiser scheduled for Pi Day, March 14.

The event was sold out with 100 guests in attendance. This is exciting because this event charged admission, which is not usual for their potlucks, but made sense since it was their Annual Fundraiser. Their theme was both Pi, the ratio of a circle’s circumference to its diameter, and pie, the delectable circle shaped baked dish with a crust and filled with either sweet or savory ingredients.

Folks brought other things to eat but the food was mostly pies. Karl made note of the fact that it was the first time they had nearly run out of food, so they would have to keep that in mind for the following year. It was obvious that their team kept learning from each event. To raise money, they had a silent auction of donated pies from commercial entities and an open auction of three pies brought by the speakers.

The agenda included multiple speakers, including a baker who makes organic, gluten-free pies, an Ohio man reminiscing about his grandma’s pies, and a math teacher elaborating on the beauty of Pi (P-I). Also speaking that evening was a former Maine poet laureate, the group’s mentor Jeremy Nobel who had authored a book called “Project Unlonely,” and another member of the advisory board who read a poem related to the theme. If this wasn’t enough, they also had a competition to see who could state the number for Pi to that furthest digit – an impressive feat attempted by at least three people.

Jennifer and I sat catty corner from each other. To my right was the financial member on the Board of Directors so I spent some of the evening picking her brain and learning about 501(c)3 organizations which are exempt from federal tax and non-profit. Across from me and next to Jennifer, was one of the speakers who was a math teacher. It was his first time attending but he seemed excited since so many in the audience were his students. On the other side of Jennifer was another speaker – the baker – and her sons and friend sat adjacent to them. We didn’t need or use the story prompts that had been given, but having received them a few days before the event helped to get us in the mood and prepared us to have some stories ready.

The environment could only be described as energetic and engaging. The baker honestly told us we were crazy for coming up from Virginia just for this event. Maybe we are crazy for traveling in March to the north, but we felt it was important to experience it in person.

Another thing we discovered was that Maine has their own version of “From Heres” and “Come Heres” where some people really made a distinction on whether your family had been there for multiple generations or if you were a “recent” transplant – recent being defined broadly. Brian, the math teacher, was almost apologetic when he told us he was not originally from Maine, but obviously that did not bother either Jennifer or me since we were both Navy wives and had moved multiple times over the years.

When we returned to Virginia after an amazing girls’ weekend in Maine, I became determined to set this type of opportunity up within our community. Backporch Vineyard and Shows the Way Coaching & Facilitation became the first two sponsors and we chose April 9th as the kickoff. In 2026 we would like to host two or three more potlucks and build momentum, but we cannot do it alone. In fact, we would love to bring many people in on this creation.

What I would like to see happen with these Story Sharing Potlucks is that it will provide an opportunity for our community to engage with each other in a safe environment. The tagline that I have been using is “Be Curious. Be Kind.” as I want everyone here to recognize the value of our own and others’ stories. In an age where we look for differences, I want us to see the things we have in common, and to appreciate it when we can learn from others’ experiences.

You may have noticed that I have used “Story Sharing Potlucks” and “Community Plate Virginia” interchangeably. We have not settled on a name yet and I am waiting to hear back from the Board of Directors in Community Plate Maine on how they would like us to proceed.

We will need to set up the infrastructure soon for the 501(c)3 so I will need to identify at least three board members and together we will create bylaws and incorporate. This will cost money to hire a lawyer so we are also looking for sponsors and will eventually set up a way to collect and manage donations.

Most potluck events should be free of cost to the public with guests only needing to bring a dish to share, but there will always be expenses in terms of advertising, printouts and the cost of beverages, once we have the basic supplies of dishes, flatware, glasses, mugs, tablecloths and napkins. For 2026, my goal is to collect at least enough for 50 guests. This year we plan to host only from Backporch, but in Maine Community Plate makes their expertise and supplies available to other facilities where hosts are available. Depending on what the Board decides, we may want to be able to extend our reach in the future.

Community Plate Maine has other functions as well. In addition to hosting Story Sharing Potluck Suppers, they conduct story telling workshops, develop a Maine Community Cookbook, and produce a Cooking is Community podcast. For each potluck event, they collect recipes and stories from guests to create an event-specific cookbook. We may or may not attempt this effort this year – it depends on the interest and availability of volunteers.

I have determined what I think we as an organization need to make this whole endeavor happen. We need volunteers so I have created a list of the roles our organization requires. There is also a list of what we would need donated to help us move forward both this year, then in the long-term.

I would like to welcome you again to this kickoff. In the spirit of generosity, let’s really make an effort to be present here in this room, for each other and for all this wonderful food. We want to remember to be grateful for all the hands and work that brought all this delicious food to our table. From the farmers to the truck drivers, grocery workers, and all the cooks and tasters.

I would like to thank all the volunteers who helped get this event running. It takes a lot of hands to put on a community potluck, and we appreciate everything everyone brought to this evening. Thank you to Jennifer for recommending Community Plate, then following up with a wonderful weekend in Maine, experiencing their potluck supper with me for the first time. Thank you to Community Plate for the ideas and inspiration, story prompts, and some of the language used this evening. You can find out more about Community Plate at https://communityplate.me. Thank you to Alan Dean for sharing his expertise on storytelling and his stories with us this evening. I would also like to thank our sponsors, especially Rick & Lorrie Gump of Backporch, for their support and encouragement and hard work to make this possible. Again, I would like to thank you for your participation in our kickoff this evening. I look forward to reading your feedback and seeing how you would like to support us in the future.

Before we go this evening, and go back to our regular busy lives, we like to take a moment to appreciate the community we have created.

Look around the room – think about the people you had conversation with, and the stories you have heard. Think about all the people whose stories you didn’t get to hear. There are so many meals and stories to share. What we did tonight, paying attention to each other, bringing parts of ourselves, sharing parts of ourselves, meeting others with respect and care – this is how create a resilient community.

We can create a community where we can all be here for each other. It’s important to remember, if you need to talk, there is someone in this room that will listen. If you need help, there is someone in this room that will help you. This is what we are building together. Thank you for being part of this community here tonight.

Please share what you have experienced with others, and we hope to see you back again soon.

Remember – Be Curious. Be Kind.